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It capstone topics write for me capstan winch switch handwriting worksheets for preschool alphabet [Music] his big ol dick and one of his balls fell out of his britches yeah my son go Daddy mr. sugar got a big old paint paint no son you and I got pee pees that's a dick [Music] well here's the story with the show really simple just a bunch of funny people all telling true stories one of the nicest guys in America mr. Ralphie May everybody my neighbor gate Tony got married lovie that ain't his real name of course he's just had a pairs of my cellphone and so my little kids now it's Uncle Tony and aunt Tim you know they're awesome just the best dudes their wedding is why you should always go if invited to a gay wedding it is fabulous I was amazed at how gay it really was like I thought it'd be gay but not gay gay but it was way again they had like Cirque du so gay and guys flying down and making out with dudes and tweaking nipples and flying back up crazy my daughter was in the wedding was you know a procession my wife was handling her I would sit with my son August who was fourth time and you know how at weddings how they have entertainment usually you know for the actual ceremony they have like like the fat girl cousin of the bride will come out and sing that horrible song from frozen you know you know and and then a little bit like you started off like a five-minute long rambling story about how she went out one time with y'all bowling and then y'all had pizza and y'all shared the last piece of pizza and that's what true love really is just like let's go big girl let's go wrap it up biggie let's go that open bar we gonna drink itself baby let's dance either that or it's like like a retarded might be retarded kid playing the trumpet with a boner you know it amazing loss his trumpet don't look at that that was musically a kind Lord Jesus Oh anything they didn't have that okay they had a six-foot four black male transvestite cher impersonator named sugar with a CH hey mister sugar was six foot four okay that's quite a striking Cher okay but my man had eight inch platform boots on with fishnet stockings got about a bustier and a cape cuz for a black man looking just like Cher we don't quite get enough my man added the Cape nice my son had a lot of questions daddy what is that that son is a transvestite that's a big old trans mess my daddy yeah yeah son that's about as big as I reckon they come yeah that's a big biggest one I ever seen dad biggest one transmits matches big dad yeah him in the back and he saw that sherry was wearing that cape and he was like daddy you think mr. sugar like sword fighting who I bet he does most funnies all the gay guys around like we like toward fun too my stuff was like man he's a bunch of cool dudes right here I like these guys Oh sugar started singing right and my man was killing it I'm not even lying oh I don't I don't know the words she just sounds like a bluetick hound dog to me so he's sounding like one something he must be on and halfway through his performance his big old dick and one of his balls fell out of his britches yeah my son go Daddy mr. sugar got a big old peepee no son you and I got pee pees that's a dick had elbow in it Lord Jesus big now and that's what August goes yep trans mess mines got sticks dad that's a life lesson son you listen to that you hold that with you I could save your life one day son transvestites got sticks amen amen what I was amazed is how professional mr. sugar was okay that thing falls out my man is obviously panicked turns gets his pocket-book ribs off from tape puts his junk back up in his britches and finishes the song oh I was like genius that was impressive that was impressive think about that ladies have we through one of your performances what are your Jana lips father you're not gonna be so composed you're not gonna tuck it back in you're not gonna go don't judge I've made a lot of bad choices in college you know what's that sound the show is over right not sugar when I did it native the ceremony went off without a hitch the reception though that was awesome those gay boys went all out 100 cases of French Champagne prime rib station seafood say just grab a lobster what okay real sushi bar with bonafide Japanese eat Japanese's real real not like you getting Pittsburgh Pennsylvania it's some white guy squinting you know this is real real I almost got tea-bagged on the way back to our table they had these risers on each corner of the dance floor and up there was basically a naked man okay I mean he was wearing a g-string but a tiny one okay and he was way bigger than that okay my man Puerto Rican g-string according to the flag on it and a man was just shaking it I'm talking to my wife as we're walking a stay a light hits a sequence goes into my periphery and I go whoa nuts I'm matrix nuts quite possibly the most athletic move I've made the last 30 years not gonna lie to you it was pretty impressive cuz that's not my luck my luck is to have the full teabag and me go sorry will you get it off my face please he's Puerto Rican I smell plantains okay you know that's my luck we get to the table right by our name are three pills and my wife goes is that candy and I'm like honey I'm pretty sure I know every candy ever made I don't know those first two are but that last one looks like pharmaceutical grade MDMA from the early 90s and my wife goes what's MDMA and I go that's ecstasy and she goes yeah you remember that don't you yeah a different gay guy comes out and he's like the gay guy in charge okay and he's like it was 720 Jeff it was 72 in my man's column three I don't think so okay everyone on your table you had three bills baby one will make you smarter will make your top and one the little Goldilocks pill good just like the Ergo it makes everything all right everybody Wow do three Oh my wife's like should we take these pills oh yes these are gay Choji damn right we're taking these the best joke they make nobody was seated to my left I grabbed them pills Dedham turn well I'm from you're gonna dance with the devil you might as well lead you know what I'm saying let's do this I'll tell you man whatever it was it worked it worked phenomenal twenty minutes later I was sitting there wondering that if the nucleus of an atom was as big as a car that Nicholas could be in Los Angeles yet the electron that roof orbited would be in New York that's how much distance is in our comparable but yet we just learned in physics that that electron which should be a static negative charge because it's always orbiting keeping and the constant positive neutral makes sense in a stable element right but no visitors have found that that electron dips throughout dimensions in and out so it could pop up in New York or Mexico City or Hawaii it's amazing it's amazing that that might be the thread that holds us to this dimension is those electrons that's what I thought was going on in my head turns out I was just tweaking my nipple holding my junk dancing to Ke$ha in the corner good times we went to 340 Diego was right it was a hell of a party it was a hell of a party so glad I went don't be homophobic no need you know I know that but it's kind of nice to be an ambassador for my accent because every gay man thinks everybody talks like me hates them couldn't be far from the truth you know they were it was impressive you know I'm glad I could be there for that because I used to be dumb you know like when I was a child of the day I I used to think the worst thing in the world we have a gay man hit on me you know it's way worse than that having 300 gay men on ecstasy not hit on you yeah yeah that sets it up right there thanks guys I've been fun I'm rapping [Applause] [Music] write for me capstone microturbine system Finger Lakes Community College.